wow

wow I can still access my blog... cool =)

the worst in me

I had a huge fight with Ahn this morning.. it got so bad that I actually punched the window of my car... my hand is swollen and blue like crazy... but I don't think the pain compares to how I feel when we fight....

I don't understand how things escalated the way they did... I absolutely hate the way she can bring out the worst it me sometimes... Part of the reason is because she never always bring her pride higher and higher the longer the fight goes... It gets me crazy because I want to talk about the problem and she seemingly just wants me to get lost.

Sabi nya lagi naman daw nya ako inaalagan... well sorry, but I don't feel that way... yes, she cooks for me when I'm at her house... she buys me food when we're at work...

But honestly, I'd rather that she take care of my emotions... I'd rather that she just show me that she doesn't want to lose me... na sana when we fight, she doesn't act with so much pride all the time.

It just hurts so bad. =(

Welcome Back

Wow....

It's been more than 2 years since I last blogged... pretty cool to look over my previous posts and see what a douche I was way back then... then again, I think I'm still a douche now. lol.

I think I need to keep a blog going for my own sanity... but I might be changing the name of the blog so I can keep my privacy.

Anyway, more to come...

People always leave

I now recognize that I will never be happy... might as well be a hermit for the rest of my f%#ng life.

screaming infidelity

I'm missing your bed, I never sleep
Avoiding the spots where we'd have to speak
And this bottle of beast is taking me home.

I'm cuddling close to blankets and sheets
You're not alone and you're not discreet.
You make sure I know who's taking you home.

I'm reading your note over again,
There's not a word that I comprehend,
Except when you signed it:
"I'll love you always and forever"

As for now I'm gonna hear the saddest songs,
And sit alone and wonder, how you're making out.
And as for me I wish that I was anywhere, with anyone, making out.

I'm missing your laugh,
How did it break?
And when did your eyes
Begin to look fake?
I hope you were as happy as your pretending

I'm cuddling close to blankets and sheets
I am alone in my defeat
I wish I knew here we're safely at home

I'm missing your bed, I never sleep.
Avoiding the spots where we'd have to speak.
And this bottle of beast is taking me home.

Well as for now I'm gonna hear the saddest songs,
And sit alone and wonder...
How you're making out.
And as for me I wish that I was anywhere, with anyone...
Making out

Your hair it's everywhere.
Screaming infidelities and taking its wear.
Your hair it's everywhere.
Screaming infidelities and taking its wear.
Your hair it's everywhere.
Screaming infidelities and taking its wear.
Your hair it's everywhere.
Screaming infidelities and taking its wear